water bills by Paula Varela published on 2021-04-07T17:35:40Z it's been such a long time, I almost thought I really forgot how to write a song. truth is I've been writing songs, and hating them almost all, thinking "I can't make a comeback after months with this crap", but then I realized I was being too hard on myself. when I submitted the first song, it wasn't the greatest one but still I did it. so here it is, not the best song, but I gotta start somewhere, right? this song is about these last few months dealing with my anxiety and thinking "it all would be so much easier if I was just a child" artwork by my amazing friend Ayelen Molina 💕 if you made it this far, you deserve at least some lyrics: I think the clock is turning the other way and a car has flipped around on the highway, so I'll light up another candle for you. Cause I'm a child in my own silly way, the panic of losing you never decays. And I get waken by the sirens, cause they never need any silence like I do. How would I grow old without you, my friend? I'd refuse to let go in the end. How would I ever know how to be amused? You never needed silence, like I do. Children playing across the street, why do I feel such jealousy? I never asked to be this damaged and neither did you. But life goes on, even against your will and tears will pile up like water bills. And getting up from bed in the mornings sounds like casting a warning, but it's up to you. How would I grow old without you, my friend? I'd refuse to let go in the end. How would I ever learn how to lose? You never needed to give in, like I do. And I draw a day of my life in my head thinking if maybe this time I can pretend I don't shatter to pieces when I hear your name... But I get waken by the sirens cause they never need any silence, like I do. Genre Folk & Singer-Songwriter Comment by Julia Bloom So good to hear you again Paula. Those opening lines drew me right in, and your captivating voice and lyrics held me till the end. 2021-04-27T00:02:13Z Comment by niki s welcome back-we have missed you! This is a sweet and mellow one with a theme we can all relate too.Really lovely work-refreshing and restorative. You back. yay. 2021-04-15T12:21:17Z Comment by Bernard Dady This is a good song and I can imagine it played with a band building up to quite a rocky crescendo. It's catchy. 2021-04-14T14:00:44Z Comment by Forest and Dove I try to keep the creating and editing process very separate - what we consider good and bad changes everyday it's best not to worry about it. This was a lovely melody, Paula! Well done! 2021-04-14T10:32:53Z Comment by JamesTristanRedding Beautiful verse melody, and I love the mellow feel. 2021-04-13T00:19:38Z Comment by Rich Waring I really like the melodies on this one - and it's lovely chilled out feel. I relate to what you and Kent said - I definitely go through phases of feeling like the mojo's not there. Sometimes I feel like I need to write the crappy ones to get them out of the way, and make space for the better ones :) 2021-04-12T13:31:56Z Comment by Erin Wolf An excellent comeback song here, Paula! I'm so glad to hear your music again. :) And goodness knows there are plenty of us in the group that have gone through our own times of seriously second-guessing our own work (raises hand). You've got great company, lady. :) 2021-04-12T04:14:41Z Comment by Charlatan, PE It's always that way, isn't it? Skip one beat then it's "WILL I EVER WRITE ANOTHER SONG AGAIN??" but if you're worried, nope, you still got it. I really like this one and that sirens/silence/like i do line is particularly great. 2021-04-11T16:51:56Z Comment by Music Box The understated guitar leading into the swell at the end goes really well with this. A lot of feeling in this one. 2021-04-11T12:55:44Z Comment by Claes Welcome back Paula! It's great to hear you singing again. And that you're writing songs again. I really hope you keep it up. Lovely lyrics! 2021-04-09T20:45:43Z Comment by LawyerOnTheLoose Wonderful voice, sweet song 2021-04-08T06:06:30Z